What About Me?

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Last night, I got into an armchair psycho-analyzing session with my girlfriend, Marvelyne. The topic? Other people. In the last week or so, I’ve been around several people who seem to have a lot of trouble engaging in a conversation if the convo does not revolve around them. Like, all this person knows is himself/herself, so that’s all he/she can talk about. There’s no discussion of world events, philosophy, politics, arts, nothing-just this person. And if the other topics of conversation come up, the person steers to conversation back around to them. Me, me, me.
So, Marvelyne and I discussed why this is. Does the person not have any other interests? Or, is it something more deep seeded? Something like a need for attention.
We all need attention, but I think there’s something “off” when someone consistently makes him/herself center of attention. I think I’m a fairly interesting guy, but I can also get bored with myself! Bring in some variety…and stop demanding the center of attention be you…this is what I would like to say to said person…but how can you do that? By “demanding” the spotlight, the person is showing his/her insecurity. To point it out will do nothing but cause a downward spiral of self doubt. I don’t want to do that to anyone. So, how do you find peace with a “friend” like this? For me, it comes to a few things: 1. Knowing the score(I know this person, I know he/she is like this, so I just accept it) and 2. Keep it in it’s place(I don’t get overly invested in some relationship that has so little depth) Is it an answer that leads to a lasting peace? No, not really. But it gives me what I want out of it for now-a friendship, keeping that person in my life, but not letting their issues control my world. Armchair psychology 101-do NOT get caught up in other peoples’ issues!

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    I know a couple people like that, one in particular, who doesn’t even hear the other person, or ever ask about “what’s going on with…” whatever happens to be a highlight or downside in a person’s life. I find these are the type of people I choose to avoid, friend or not, because if you can’t have an intelligent conversation, what’s left?

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