Debe Hoffman is the sister of my favorite nurse, Barb, who stars in both “After This…” And “The Other End Of The Stethoscope.” As you’ll read, Debe has three kids nearly identical in age to my three stepkids. She, however, has had these kids from the point of conception where I got the privilege of step fathering just a year ago.
Anyway, Debe has given me little insights along the way about raising kids – especially as they transition out of teenagehood (is that a word? Is now!) into adulthood. Here’s a story she shared with me yesterday…. my comments follow.
Just as I had completed reading your Engel’s Ensights newsletter for September, the phone rang. it was the oldest (22 years old) now calling from school. He was so excited about a seminar that he had just left and wanted to share. He was one of only 10 seniors to be selected to spend 8 hours with some “guru” consultant on how to write a resume for both work and graduate school purposes.
He was able to capture some one on one time with the gentlemen after the session. Although this guy is paid by the hour and had fulfilled his obligations for the day, he stopped and talked to Nate for a few minutes about some individual input. Nate knew there was another appointment the guy (sorry forgot his name – Nate did tell me) needed to get to and he was running late, so Nate indicated that he didn’t mind talking with him as he walked to his next appointment to allow the man to be on time. The guy stopped packing up his stuff and looked at Nathan and said, my investment in your future is what I am here to assist with – that is my mission and you deserve more than a winded conversation. He talked to Nate for about 5 minutes and made arrangements for them to get together before the final seminar and never lost eye contact. After that was taken care of the guy asked for the quickest way to get across the campus and Nate showed him out and on his way, saving the guy the 5 minutes he spent with Nate in the walk to the next appointment.
Nate ran into another student on his way to his next destination, and he was now running late himself. She stopped and asked about the seminar, she was not one of the lucky ones to get selected to attend. She wants to go to Law school and is really concerned about doing all the right things etc. Nate started to ask her to walk with him to class and he would give her some feedback on the seminar. But he remembered what the consultant had just done for him. So he stopped and made arrangements to meet her later. She was parked nearby and offered him a ride to his next destination and he arrived early.
It isn’t always the book learning that sticks, it’s the application of knowing how to live and live with a full heart and a comforted soul.
Debe, you couldn’t be more right! And the way to live with a full heart and comforted soul comes from the relationships we cultivate throughout life. Nate also got such an important lesson from this guru – when you’re speaking with someone, be fully engaged with him/her. It’s respectful and shows that person they are truly important and worth the investment. Truer words could not be spoken than what the guru said to Nate. Every adult who invests in the lives of tomorrow’s generation should take note!